What we display with our bodies, accounts for around 80% of our communications. The way we stand, sit, hold our arms, use our hands, focus our eyes and plant our feet, are all giveaways in what we are really thinking or saying.
A good salesperson will know the tell-tale signals when driving for a purpose. A guard, policeman or interrogator, will use their perception training to know when a person is concealing the truth.
There are many giveaway muscles in the face that an astute card player will focus on, when choosing to fold or raise the odds. Position of the feet, knees and proximity can reveal how attracted or repelled we are to some other.
These skills are essential for negotiation and for managing people.
What every body is saying – a book by ex-FBI agent, Joe Navarro, should be in everybody's library, for understanding how people 'tick' and provide us with the tools for achieving what we want in business situations, attracting a partner or even pacifying an aggressor.
We look but we don't see, or we see, but fail to act. The mirror can reflect inconvenient and sometimes painful truths about ourselves. It's taking the time to acknowledge these reflections, then more time to invest conscious efforts in addressing what we see, take action and then learn from our experiences.
The greatest tools for reflection are also the simplest to practice. We merely need silence. Allowing only 15-20 minutes for quiet meditation in the morning and again in the evening, will help us to cut through the chatter of the mind in order to set up and re-evaluate our day.
Our minds, much like computers perform, are constantly running 'programmes' which have imprinted information for running the hardware which we identify with as being 'me'. However, contrary to what we believe is our true selves, it turns out not to be the case at all.
We have a program running which is like the 'front-end' interface of an app or desktop computer. It's referred to as the ego. This ego, has been defined over our lifetime and the information it's founded on, has been imparted to us from our early guardians and cemented through our life experiences.
Often our parents or early carers, who have been the main programmers of this founding Ego programming, will determine how we perform and depending on our types of upbringing, the messages received, experiences had, plus the confirmation of our knowledge through peers and environment over time, we'll reinforce much of our early information into the ego programme. This becomes an attachment by which many define themselves.
Underneath the workings or the main ego programme, are the subconscious desires, fuelled by emotion and instinct. These are the real workings of the 'machine' in which we host, where we filter information through the various other programs, all running below our level of consciousness which is falsely masked by the Ego.
Many of the daily programmes running our lives, will become semi-autonomous. For example, waking, breathing, eating. We believe they are purely mindless actions, but these are actually patterns of learned behaviour, which, should we choose to manage, can be assessed and re-programmed for overall improvement. We can change our behaviour and improve the operation of the nervous system – even enhancing functions of the autonomic nervous systems. Walking
– Are we pacing really fast and not taking in the beautiful surroundings?
– Are we carrying a heavy bag over one shoulder, affecting spinal alignment?
– Is our footstep heavy and negatively impacting the knee and hip joints?
Breathing
– How deep are our breaths?
– Are we breathing from the nostrils or mouth?
– Is the breath coming from our diaphragm or just the upper rib cage?
Eating
– Are we choosing the right kind and amount of food?
– How many times are chewing and are we assimilating with enzymes correctly?
– Have we allowed time to eat and digest when relaxed?
Tasks for the body's survival and general fulfilment of its needs may be running in the background, but how much notice are we taking of the signals? What impact will there be on the body if we ignore the signs, avoid taking action and don't re-programme our behaviours? It's important to pause, reflect and work on what's best for you and sometimes 'you' can be the obstacle in the way of making the right decisions.
When ego programming has become so strong in decision-making, we tend to form very fixed ideas about who we are, what we need to do and what's best for us – which all may be completely wrong for our well-being. When this happens, life can put up a mirror to our faces – a reminder for change.
Breaking The Programming
Dr Joe Dispiaza has been at the cutting edge of research into hacking the body's systems for breaking harmful patterns, habits and behaviours. Essentially, we are often too quick to dismiss our inner feelings and desires, because we've learned patterns of behaviour which can be very difficult to undo.
Even faced with serious illness or even death, chronic sufferers of diabetes, heart disease and other forms of illness resulting from bad habits or over-consumption, will initially take measures to address problems, but quite often, will revert to the same programming that caused the problems in the first place.
Joe Dispiaza has meditation guides online for free and some great books to read on how to take back control of our minds. Two of the other leading Doctors in the field of human psychology are Robert Trivers and Dr Daniel Kahneman – who address the very real problems or self-deceit, lazy thinking, cognitive biases and the general infallibility of our mind to store trustworthy memories.
Again – knowing we have deceptive ways and intelligently understanding the workings
of our complex minds, are useful for comprehension tools, but are simply not enough to encourage us to take positive action. We may lack the discipline and dedication to counter the ego in order to undo the destructive programming. Often, the most well-educated and seemingly brightest people, are the worst affected. This is why society has overweight health practitioners, alcoholic scholars and morally corrupt authoritarians.
Third-Party Mirrors
Sometimes, the only way to break free from ourselves, is to employ the services of professionals. Society has rules in place to protect us and we employ police and judges to enforce these rules. Effectively, we are the police, the judges and the common people all enrolled in one, but we may not have the best workforce on our team and that's why leadership by example is so rare.
We can pay for life coaches, personal trainers, psychiatrists and therapists. Or we can save the money, do it ourselves and improve our self-discipline, self-respect and confidence at the same time.
However, many of our programmes for enforcement, prevention and continued assessment of progress, are flawed. There are contributing factors to why we fail, but following a regular routine, which includes quiet meditative reflection morning and night; including keeping a daily diary (mood & food), plus incorporating milestones/ways to measure/assess results and reward personal success, definitely have been shown to attract positive results.
By diligently following a daily ritual over a minimal 30-day period, we can unlock the habits which harm us and even stop them from coming back. Certain religious festivals are good motivators for positive abstinence, which encourage commitment to reaching short-term goals, plus elevate our awareness for feeling gratitude, kindness & greater compassion towards ourselves and others, through continued self-reflection. Even if we are not followers of any religion, some of their practices really can encourage us be better people.
Lent is likely one of the greatest markers we can follow for self-awareness. The start dates for Lent are in the winter around mid to late February and end after a 40-day period, coinciding with the beginning of Spring. After the extravagances of Christmas and celebrations are over from both Western and Chinese New Year, this period is an ideal opportunity to make reflective changes.
However we choose to reflect, the benefits of looking ourselves square in the eye, understanding the requirements for maintaining and improving our lives and doing more to help ourselves and those around us, will attract greater spiritual, physical and mental as well as financial rewards.
How we see ourselves and how others see us, are completely different things altogether. The image we portray on the world, is something we have the power to influence, but how our image is perceived by others is totally out of our control.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, so they say. But there are some clear physical indicators that can sway the majority. For example, facial symmetry has been cited as a reliable marker for measuring one's attractiveness. These physical traits are what we're born with. Health is another marker. Clear skin, bright eyes and general vitality are clear signs of a healthy person, advertising their good genetics perhaps. We can improve much on what we're already given through lifestyle, exercise and styling choices etc.
A lot of the cues we pick up on, are biologically hard-wired for reproduction purposes. When sourcing a suitable partner, many would say athleticism is a good all-around measure of one's health and capabilities. For women seeking a mate, broad shoulders and height will feature in the subconscious decision-making. As for men, the breast size, fullness of the lips and hip-to-waist ratio will play a factor.
Money
Aside from the physical attributes, which are mostly governed by subconscious reproductive desires, there are also psychological considerations at play. There are very clear differences between what men and women want from a partner and often, physical attractiveness will come lower down the list than resourcefulness – especially for women. Bringing up children, requires a stable financial base and money can provide the resources for making a nest. It's potentially why older, less physically attractive, wealthier men tend to fare so well with beautiful women. Although financial stability is attractive for forming relationships, the selection processes won't necessarily boil down to simply having money.
Social Standing
It's true that folks with financial wealth, tend to have better prospects and greater connections through their network. Having the money to buy into elite circles, can facilitate greater access to more resources via social standing. Both men and women alike, are drawn towards those with better access to a social ladder. Having good connections can be useful, but having connections at hand is not a guarantee that success will follow.
Confidence
How we portray ourselves to others, is very much dependent on how we feel about ourselves inside. Therefore, we need to love who we are and feel totally comfortable in our own skin for contentment. Exuding happiness, well-being and confidence to the outside world, will increase our attractiveness above and beyond the physical, financial and social aspects.
Confidence attracts success and we become more interesting to onlookers as a result. Self-belief in one's abilities, can increase the probability of success in sport, business or whatever we put our minds to. Belief in a positive outcome for our ventures, will relieve us of anxiety and enforce stability. Others will trust us and want to be a part of what we are doing. Confidence can conquer all negatives through believing in ourselves more, because success comes to those who strive for it and everyone ultimately, loves a winner...
We project an identity of self which our peers, family and friends come to know as our true selves. This same persona – our avatar for the world – is how we are perceived by others, but it's often a perception far from reality.
We never get to know this character, as a lot of this projection is generated to mask our true identity, much of what we put out there, is false and because we rarely take the time for self-reflection, we leave ourselves open for identity crises.
Self Denial
Our defence mechanisms are so powerful, that left unchecked, we could find ourselves living out an existence which is contrary to our truest desires. Relationships, careers and life paths can all be heading us in the wrong direction as the defence programs kick in to steer us away from fear, risk and any perceived harm. Fear of doing the 'wrong thing' or of being an outcast from the group, because our views are contrary to those around us, or fear of failure through taking perceived risks and the potential resulting harm, should our actions be unsuccessful, can result in choosing a life we weren't wishing to live.
We are constantly lying to others, mainly as a way to fit in and avoid confrontation. And the better we are at lying to others, the better we become at self-deceit too. But through allowing more time for self-reflection, we can recognise/acknowledge which of the actions we take, are in fact the decisions of our parents, teachers, our partners or our friends – and not our own.
Quiet moments for enquiry will put the questions forward for considered thought, which are required states for unlocking our true potential, aspirations and goals. We can then start to define our true selves.
Isolation For Reflection
It's important to take regular time for absolute solitude. Spending moments in isolation, can help evoke sustained periods for self-scrutiny and introspection. It's not often a pleasant exercise, but pushing through these uncomfortable moments – ranging from abject boredom to heavy self-reprimanding bordering on abuse, one can eventually find peace. And it's from this peace of mind, that we can develop.
Yogic practices for self-observation, like the 10-day Vipassana meditation, can help one to connect with the inner, calmer self and stop oneself from focussing on the anxious chatter that we become attached to and identify as the self.
Forced isolation through imprisonment or through other more compliant methods, has helped shake troubled individuals from the false self. The Chinese have state-run boot camps for game-addicted teenagers where tough-love parents drop their children off for rehabilitation. Being locked away for 10 days, with a pencil and paper and no other distractions, can help those wracked with self-identity worries, addictions and neurosis to make notes or a diary of the feelings that arise. Long hikes in the countryside without any mobile phone coverage and just a steady hypnotic pace, can create a meditative state for our true feelings to emerge and this can be the perfect time for self-assessment.
Another way to truly face our demons, and purge the soul of the toxic thoughts and a false-identity, is to take ayahuasca or undergo the Kambo ceremony.
Blame Culture
It's natural to point blame away from ourselves. We are hard-wired to project failings on others and avoid inward reflection of where the cause may lie. It's again about self-preservation and self-denial. Taking blame away from ourselves, and our actions and directing it instead towards others and the resulting situations, is another tool in our self-denial program.
Rather than admit we are at fault, it is admittedly easier to lay blame on other people. It's difficult to acknowledge our failings, but with practice, writing out a diary, plus through a dedicated, regular and ongoing assessment, we can all benefit from self-reflection, the analysis, adjustments and refinements, to create a more realistic projection of self.
Where attention goes, our energy flows and the future reality is manifested. There's infinite choices available to us and choosing a direction, will direct our focus towards a destination.
If we are mindful of our choices, we determine the desired outcome with planning.Usually, for a holiday abroad, we'll research locations and accommodation, making choices based on not only price & value but by what we want to experience when we get there. the images of the hotel rooms, the beaches and surrounding areas will light-up the creative pathways as we envisage warm, sunny beaches, infinity pools with cold beverages and appetising food. Often these memories are influenced by the past. Now they become intertwined with the images we can see in brochures, online holiday portals and booking agents – we have a mental picture. Once the flight and transfers are secured – we have the belief cemented of a future reality.
Adaptation & Application
Starting off with a board from scratch can be a challenge. The ideas may not come easy. Work stresses and family commitments, can take up a lot of energy, leaving us a little numb at the end of a busy day.
Finding the right mind-state can be the most difficult aspect of kicking-off the creative process. It takes a time to find the silence, before the synapses can function – but before we get the physical and mental 'space' to begin, there needs to be inspiration.
Start simple. Go over all the things that you are grateful for in your life and list all the things that you wish to keep enjoying in the future. Add pictures even some trinkets which have significant meaning. Then work up to the things you enjoy doing most, finishing up perhaps with plans for where you'd like to go and where you would like to be at a significant time the future. Use person images, search online and cut out magazines if that helps. You may just pin a couple of things at first – don't worry, seeing that board often, will encourage more thoughts to came through!
– Family & loved ones
– Health related activities
– Pets and home
– Financial wealth and the trapping
– House and car
– Equipment and the add-ons
– Hobbies
– Holidays and adventures
– Aspirational jobs
– Personal goals )whatever they may be)
Now place the board somewhere prominent. I have mine on the back of the clothes cupboard, where I go every day to get dressed. I also have reminders on the bedroom door and if you have a partner who shares your visions, then add a joint vision board to the bathroom door for both of you to consider the future dreams, desires and manifestations.
Belief & Attraction
Applying the same techniques from The Law of Attraction, and meditating on these thoughts daily, will help retain focus and keeping a diary, will ensure the path to the desired goals, can be measured by every small milestone and ultimately will bring closer to success.
Don't put off today what you can do tomorrow. Life is so short and tomoorow is not a given! Plan out your life's paths, rich with meulti-dreams and desires to inspre action. See it and work towards it.
Speaking out loud with conviction, the words to command one's desires and to re-affirm beliefs – this is how we bring thoughts into the realms of reality.
Affirmations have the power to lift us – and studies have shown even the most negative people's attitudes can be changed through practice. We are all very easy people to manipulate – even by our own voice, further enforced through the tone in which the words are uttered. If we stay in our minds too much, the chatter of negativity we direct towards ourselves, and others, which creates situations to define negative outcomes can easily become our mantras for living.
We all have the potential to channel positive energy. We can attract or repel and alternate this power in an instant – we merely need to project the energy we feel and it will be sensed by others as confidence, approachability and attractiveness. Powerful intentions and affirmations, spoken aloud at the beginning of the day, are how we kick-start the positive vibes.
We can make our own mantras up to suit our needs. For a quick start, try these simple affirmations in the morning, shortly after waking up. Repeat each line out loud three times, using the breath in between each line to help punctuate and to achieve greater projection of the voice.
I draw unlimited energy into my body,I feel more energised with every second,I feel AMAZING! Great things, are a series, of small things, brought together.
These mantras, spoken aloud, are best carried out facing a mirror or better still, a partner, so we can reinforce the intentions through visualisation of us saying (and feeling) each of the words. And if this is carried out with our girlfriend/boyfriend, husband/wife etc. we can influence each other's day to be more positive – the louder and more heartfelt – the more likely the positive mindset will be throughout the day.
The methods for manifestation of outcomes through visualisation, is a powerful technique for realising our life's dreams and heart's desires. This creative form of attraction or projection for positive 'wish fulfilment' is used by many successful people, to activate the laws of attraction.
To create something from our thoughts in to the reals of existence, we first need to visualise the desired object/outcome in our minds eye. From the point of 'seeing' the desired wish as a blurry image, we need to progress the clarity of this image from static to a fully immersive moving experience – positioning this lucid clip in our minds eye, coupled with a belief that this objet, event or outcome had already occurred. This belief in the outcome already happening in our not so distant future, is a really important factor for bringing the thoughts forward in to the real world.
Feeling a sense of accomplishment (from the hard work we've invested in creating this manifestation – it will take a strong will, dedicated practice and discipline), and through showing our continued gratitude for receiving our desired outcome, will add extra attraction energies for attaining goals. The process of actively feeling in our hearts, the rewarding benefits of achieving success – as if this wish/desire had already come to fruition – will free the mind of anxiety, stress, plus cancel-out any delf-defeating barriers we may have put in our way (subconsciously or via external societal pressures), for actively achieving this desired result.
The Power Of Belief
Our minds are very powerful motivators but they are also inhibitors for creating success by holding-up the required actions we need to put in motion. Saying to ourselves that we are going to achieve the objective is not enough on it's own, because we need to work towards achieving it, and subconsciously, we could be telling ourselves that 'we're not good enough', or 'we don't deserve to have success', or 'we'll never achieve this desired outcome because it's impossible'. We do all this reasoning within a fraction of the time it takes to actually say the affirmations that will create what it is we desire. Whereas, the 'feelings' and gratitude or relief we feel when the work has been put it to achieve results – backed-up by our taking the right steps forward for achieving the focus of our desire, will be self-affirming 'markers' than merely expressing words 'saying' that we are going to action something....thoughts need belief and followed with action backed by conviction.
We really are our own worst enemy when it comes to manifesting thoughts, either good or bad. Thoughts that focus on the prize, will create actions to get us there. Our inaction will be the result of our mind's negative ability for self-sabotaging any success. Positives attract & negatives repel. Either we realise this fact and feel belief in our heart – for without the faith in our beliefs to take hold and the belief they will be achieved, success will be a non-starter.
Practice Positivity
Start small. Practice making small but significant wins over our self-defeating minds. Decisions you make today, can be a positive step for tomorrow. For instance, when joining the gym, the hardest bit about going to the gym, is actually stepping in to the gym itself! The work put in once we are there is the easiest bit.
So, to improve health, strength and wellbeing – and for an example of how virtual visualisation is a precursor for actual action, practice seeing yourself in the gym early in the morning tomorrow. Run through your routine of waking, washing, getting ready and eating nutritious food before leaving the house with a gym kit. Then before going to bed, recall the vision of going through the routine and being at the gym, working out. Then visualise how the rewarding efforts have made you feel post workout – being invigorated and strong – with the satisfaction of knowing objectives have been followed through to completion.
If you found yourself up early and working out in the gym the next day – this will be a positive indicator of how your powers for visualisation bring actions towards a goal!
Reminders & References
Having the image in our minds is sometimes not enough of a motivation and can easily be slipped from the conscious mind as we go about our busy days. IF we have the one goal one day of the week, how can we build on this for greater success. Our one-day visualisation will fade along with our motivation. It takes more permanent images in the real world, to hold our attention more often and for longer, to act as constant reminder for where we desire to be.
If we go back to the previous example of how we may desire to be fitter, stronger, faster and better looking with our clothes off: one powerful reminder is to have images of those who have achieved their goals.
Eugene Sandow was one of the early body builders who advertised his adonis-like physique for what can be achieved through following a dedicated weight training program. Victorians didn't have the same opportunities we have today. They were very much restricted in how much time and what kind of nutrition they had at hand, as well as having access to equipment for chiselling the perfect body. Yet Sandow managed to realise his dream of becoming an admired body builder and the extra money earned, awarded him the free time to live the lifestyle he desired. Sandow didn't have special diets or fad training techniques – he merely stayed consistent in his training and focussed his plans on the daily requirements for manifesting the physique he so desired.
Pin It
Pin up photos, have wallpaper mages on your home screen and computer, create a pin-board of images and references that match the dreams and visions and use these as reminders of what you want to achieve – then focus on the actions required to get you the outcome you desire by following a diary to remind you of the successful actions taken to achieve goals.
How many of us, at the first signs of illness, report to a chemist or a doctor for medical help? It's natural to seek-out a remedy for improving how we feel, but before we spend our hard-earned cash on drugs or embark on that doctor's visit, we could first ponder a strange but scientifically proven fact: The very idea of doing something to fix our symptoms of illness - ie. thinking about putting something like a pill in our bodies, could in itself be enough to make us better, regardless of any pills we ingest.
The Process For Wellness
The first steps to recovery should be from our own assessments of why we are below par, but that's often not what happens for so many of us. Because without a thought for the causes of our afflictions (stress, poor lifestyle/sleep/diet etc.), we'll likely head to the pharmacy for a quick fix instead.
A pharmacy, with employees in brilliant white coats, shelves upon shelves of lotions, potions and pills, signify that we're in the right place for all manor of health remedies. The professional-looking folks, can further bolster this confirmation, because by the very act of talking with these accredited health practitioners, we'll be another step forwards towards recovery, as we'll discover further on....
We can blindly trust the opinions of doctors, nurses, chemists and health practitioners, to such an extent that merely having a conversation with them, can alleviate discomfort/pain and encourage recovery. It's why we seek to speak with these individuals in authority for all matters of health. It's the reassurance that it offers, that alters our perception – the relief that a professional is involved.
In the same way as having the initial thought to get well, aids our recovery, the thought of visiting a health 'professional', of our being immersed in an environment with health products, plus speaking with a qualified 'expert' to receive confirmations about our symptoms, to then be paired with the packaged products on the shelves, – will all be subconscious steps further along our path to recovery. And amazingly, this process occurs without us even taking a pill.
When the action is underway for seeking advice, processes of recovery will has already started. The chemist or physician will first question the symptoms. By establishing 'confirmation' agreements with the client/us (empathically delivered responses work even more effectively), suggesting a medicine remedy which has the pre-confirmed ingredients commonly 'recognised' in the market as potential benefactors of relief, their job has been accomplished already. The mind and body are working away and we'll be well on our way to recovery at this point.
Now pause a second before purchasing a quick-fix drug next time and ask one's self: Do we need the actual products being proposed/sold here or are we just in need of some good sleep, nutrition and naturally occurring medicine coming from fresh ingredients (vitamin C), fresh air and sunshine (vitamin D) – ensuring we have enough calcium, zinc, magnesium and B vitamins in the diet really helps. Chances are, the latter will be what's required.
If you've paused at the till, for one last 'fix' of positive steps towards recovery – check the packaging. The products sold in this health-benefitting environment, will have messages like 'pain relief' or 'fast recovery' on the box and will likely be branded/badged by one of the pharmaceutical companies who are 'trusted' in the industry (often bolstered through advertising), by the chemist (it's a shop at the end of the day) or by the doctor (perhaps also encouraged to promote for financial gain – but certainly to justify their higher salaries). The messaging on the pack can be enough. Now put the products back on the shelf, hit the grocery instead and feel confident that the recovery is in an advanced stage already!
Belief Can Be The Greatest Medicine
If you've gotten this far, you're showing a willingness to be open-minded to this way of thinking. Many people will not be able to even contemplate having the power to heal themselves and that's already affecting their ability to self-heal. What we are witnessing above – from the first thoughts about being ill (something in itself what creates the actual illness), down to being at the point of purchase, are 'triggers' for confirmation bias. We have made a decision to get well. It's the environment, behaviours and delivery of the messaging from professionals, plus the packaging of the product, that are creating the magic. The magic is in our belief!
The best way to stay healthy, is to manage the contributing factors for health – namely reducing & perhaps avoiding the things that are potentially harmful, like too much alcohol, smoking, greasy, overly-processed foods and enduring sustained high-stress situations in work or relationships.
Enforce Your Own Beliefs
When we feel 'below par', 'out of sorts' or as some wrongfully call it: 'unwell', just remember to pause and think about how our behaviours and thinking/mindset bring confirmation of what we believe, this can attract both positive and negative outcomes. Think positively and note how good things tend to happen more often.
Therefore, if we tell ourselves that we are 'ill' or 'sick' etc., what we are actually doing, is allowing the malaise to take a hold. Of course, we have to consider that even the most positive outlook on a situation could mean delaying getting professional help when it really is required. That's called being delusional. We have to listen to our bodies. Sustained periods of feeling tired, poor appetite, dizzy or below 60% one's best. it's definitely time to get a check-up.
Drawing from my own experiences over the years, by measuring my effectiveness/mood/energy on a percentage scale, with an equation worked out to factor-in exactly why the results are below 99% (nobody reaches 100%!), we can assess the reasons and take action towards recovery. Sometimes this involves taking paracetamol and other anti-inflammatories (inflammation is common with colds etc.), but often just means (for me especially), an early night after a nutritious meal and possibly involving some yoga, walking in nature or more endorphin-releasing exercise.
The Placebo Belief & Effect
The very title 'Placebo Effect', should incorporate the word 'belief', because the solution is not actually in staking the pill itself, because studies show that we get the same beneficial effects without the pills.
The placebo effect is based purely on belief. The individual is healed through a belief they are taking medicine and even when it's known what they are taking is a placebo. Unconsciously, the action of wanting to heal and taking the steps for recovery are hard wired in us. We have more power than we realise to effect change – the more we believe that fact, the better we'll get at enforcing the results.
We live out our own individual lives. Our perception, our projections and our realisation of what life is and the meanings we attach to it, are all our own - nobody else's. How we address the world and those around us, is dependant on how we feel about ourselves. Compassion allows us to have feelings as if experienced from another's perspective and by putting ourselves in their shoes, we can better understand life.
Shifting And Giving
Take a moment to pause and think about how other people around you, may be seeing things differently. How are you coming across? Realise that your actions and words can be taken in different ways. Understand that a certain approach to that person, can be received in all manor of different ways. Imagine how you look and sound as you project your desires, intentions, will and energy.
A really good way to get a clearer perspective of ourselves, from a third-person perspective, is to record a video with audio of a real-life situation. This way, we can see how our facial expressions, body language, tone of voice and assess if we are talking too much, instead of listening to what the other person is saying.
Judith Lasater's wise words on how positioning yourself from another's perspective can be empowering –
“When you feel pressured to make a different choice in some small thing, focus on the other person's point of view. If possible, shift to their point of view. This is not the same as giving in. Shifting viewpoint requires strength; giving in comes from fear.”
We all have our little life dramas playing out in our head. Meditation can help to quieten these chattering voices and if everyone knew the power of meditation techniques to help detach themselves from this internal noise, we'd all be much better at communicating in and calm and understanding way.
Simply sitting quietly for 10-15 minutes in the morning and evening, focussing on the breath and observing the distracting stream of messages, will help us to be more mindful of one's energetic impact on others, but it will also allow space for mindful thought processes at the crucial moments before interaction – for properly assessing situations on how best to approach others.
Even the happiest and most good natured folk can experience low points from time to time. It's at depressed moments like these, when we feel the full weight of life upon our shoulders, experiencing low energy and a lack of motivation, that we should take stock of who we are and what is going well.
Recognising our good fortune, the love we have in our lives and counting off all the blessings held with our family, friends and health, will help to re-energise and lift up our spirits, with only a few simple words written or spoken.
"I am grateful"
Whenever a low-mood takes you, quickly write out a list of all the things you have going well in your life at that time. Think about others who have not even a roof over their heads, who are sick and alone. Count out how many fortunate attributes you have reasons to be grateful for and magically, the world becomes a better place for you – and perhaps your desire to be more generous towards others is heightened too. Being charitable, humble and giving, will help us all to receive more positive energy.
Manifesting Through Gratitude
In order to attract greatness into our paths, we first need to extend our positive energy outwards, which like a radio mast, attracts even more positive energy our way. Positive attraction can be activated via a process of repeating positively spoken words and mantras. Visualisation and focus on what we want, coupled with a strong belief in our ability to achieve desired goals, can help us to manifest positive results. These manifestations are not generated from 'emptiness', but from the world around us, created with focussed, wilful intent – filtered through the mind's Reticular Activating System into being.
Where your attention goes, energy flows...
We are constantly being bombarded with streams of sensory information. The job of the RAS, is to ensure we don't get overloaded with too much info, so it focusses only on what is required and important to us. The RAS then filters out the rest. So when we focus on the things we want, we start to 'see' what we desire as the mind adjusts the pathways in our brain and senses, to be more receptive in obtaining these desires. Conversely, the same could be said for the things we don't want and that kind of attraction stems from having a negative outlook. Like attracts like – it really is that simple.
If we only focus on negative aspects of life, the RAS filter will attract negatives towards us. Not having positives to focus on, means the RAS filter will 'fail to see' the positives which are abundantly all around us. People who are generally quite negative, tend to forget that 'like attracts like' and it's people, who we term 'glass half empty' types – ie. the ones who lack optimism, that tend to moan about not having things go their way. Those who claim to have bad luck tend to attract more bad luck. But luck can be created through positive mindsets and gratitude.
Making Luck
Volunteer your services to a charity – because helping others who really do need assistance, will reaffirm how lucky you are. Create more luck by working harder to increase your odds of success. If you are mostly a reserved type of person, make a bold step out into the unknown – by taking on something you wouldn't normally do, which generates 'hidden' opportunities from chance. Then we are good to go.
Once gratitude has been awarded, one's good fortune realised through charitable deeds, pessimistic attitudes removed through random acts of 'letting go' – it's time to put one's desires out there into the cosmos... Remember This Simple Fact
Whatever the practised focus and intent is directed at – this will become the new reality. Positive intention attracts positive outcomes. Conversely, repetitive focus on negative intentions, will attract poor outcomes for those who 'wish' them upon themselves. We need to be more aware of how our subconscious thoughts could be affecting the positive/negative balance. Therefore, careful considerations need to be given to our energies, on how we think and what we say, because what we project through our thoughts, through written and spoken words, is ultimately the direction we head in and the person we become.
SPOKEN, WRITEN AND CHANTED HARMONY Words are powerful motivators. Words are badges and words can influence who we are. Therefore, it can be said that, when creating positive mindsets, this process can be achieved through the repetition of positive words. These words attach and become a defining force.
Desires and wishes are aspirations for where we want to be, whereas affirmations are the written/spoken application we utilise for revealing our thoughts to manifest them in to the present moment for projecting of our future self.
There's a subtle and yet fundamental difference between affirmations and mantras. Mantras are our vibrational affirmations. They are our deepest defining roots. In their most simplest forms, they can help free the mind to induce calm. From this inner-space, we allow the setting up of our intentions and manifestations, providing an environment for them to form in.
Chanting a mantra out aloud is similar to speaking an affirmation purposefully. But where our affirmations can reinforce the intent in our mind, a mantra uttered with focus on the sound it makes, will resonate the vibrations throughout the body. Repeated over time, the words, their meaning and the powerful harmonious vibrations, activate the energy points in our bodies, called chakras.
The sacred sanscrit mantras have sounds that connect with our seven chakras. Speaking these positive words, creates sounds which activate and cleanse the chakras of the body. We can create our own personal mantras and speak them in our native tongues, but the power of the sonic Sanskrit vibrations as they reverberate throughout the body, are what help us to clear out the mind-chatter while meditating and connect the body, mind and spirt together from root to crown.
The Sound Of The Universe We chant the OM sound in yoga practice, to bring ourselves in to harmony with the universe around us. The sound is broken down in to different parts, which create a resonance in the chest, the throat and top of the palette, with a pause for silence at the end of each OM chant symbolising the abyss from where we originated from and return to. The sound frequency of the Om mantra is 432Hz, which is the sound of the universe. These magic harmonious frequencies have connections to nature.
Chanting the OM 108 times is also said to induce greater calm, clear the mind and increase greater vigor in the body.
Transcendental Meditation focusses on a one or two syllable word, which is repeated over and over. There's a list of words which are relevant for males and females at different ages and stages of development.
Primordial sounds are powerful meditation techniques rooted in the vedic Indian traditions. Silently repeating a personal mantra, helps one to attain peace and enter a deeper level of awareness.
Our perception is our reality, with consciousness our own unique perspective of this truth, all presented to us through the senses. Confirmation of the facts we choose to believe are in the bedrock from which we project our existence. Therefore, what we choose to believe about ourselves, is what we become.
Goals are the culmination of a significant number of factors, which we need to focus on if we want to achieve good results. Desire, determination and dedicated hard work, all come together to form a synergetic union.
However, without strong self-belief in our abilities, to achieve great things, our goals will never be attained. We not only have to desire the goal – we first need to know what the goal actually is, looks like and in order to bring about its existence, must believe a foregone conclusion that the goal has already been reached. This manifestation technique for attaining goals, is something we can realise through visualisation.
Confidence Is King
Conviction of our beliefs can be attained via feedback loops coming through from family, friends, colleagues and peers, or they can come to us from within. Confidence is fragile, ephemeral, and transient – easily affected by a broad number of factors. Relying on others to confirm our worth, will leave us open to failure. We need to reinforce our confidence by following a very careful self-evaluation process. This is not an easy thing to do.
Low mood, energy and self-esteem can come from being in the wrong environment, around the wrong people or through consumption of mind-altering substances like alcohol/drugs or by having poor nutrition and diet.
Energy can be enhanced with a walk in nature, taking in fresh air, ingesting organic and nutritious food, having a good night's sleep, laughing with family, and friends or sharing quality time with loved ones. We can also perform acts of kindness, generosity, and charity and receive positive energy through performing a day's rewarding hard work, providing services and both giving/receiving gratitude for our endeavours.
The tiny amount of energy required to generate a smile or raise a laugh will quickly get happy endorphins flowing in abundance if we are first open to administering some effort. However, happiness and smiles can fade just as quickly as they form if the underlying foundations are weak and without conviction, self-knowing and belief. ie. confidence: – for without it, we may be irresolute, defeatist and resigned to a miserable fate.
Confidence is a powerful motivator, but it has its negative side too. Not only do we need positive quantitative results to cement confidence in ourselves, but we also need to know our data is taken from quality sources. Delusional, over-confident characteristics can be formed from a very early age. A mother should be every child's advocate. Scientific study has shown that positive feedback coming from parents at an impressionable time and teachers at primary school age, can create confidence that carries through into our adult lives. But even if we are fortunate enough to have a loving mother, false appraisal data can create shaky foundations. We can fall short of the mark in a real world scenario of expectations if we only base our talents on potentially biased, narrow-band confirmation feedback loops.
House Of Cards Confirmation bias can create a warped sense of reality, so it's really important to ascertain where and from whom our feedback data is coming from, to avoid becoming arrogant and over-confident. Being aware of this second stage of confirmation is called metacognition, which is essentially mindful self-awareness. This is a preferable mind-state where we actually become 'aware of being aware'. We are able to make critical assessments, have ego-free internal investigations/dialogue, address issues and move forward without attachment to negative self-criticism or becoming delusional with over-inflated opinions of ourselves.
Meditative states, create the right mindset. One must become still and quiet to allow the self-awareness processes to work it's magic and taking a mere 10 minutes in the morning and evening, can bring greater clarity. There's a lot we don't know and there's even more that we don't know we don't know. So it pays to be humble – to listen and understand more, so self-confidence can build on solid knowledge at it's root. It is from that standpoint that we are empowered to take stock and attract greater self-confidence through daily self-assessments/evaluations for further growth.
Attraction And The Secret
Rhonda Bryne's book, The Secret, explains a technique of belief attraction through the repetitive affirmation writing process and goal projection. Having a strong belief in the technique itself, visualising the end goal and repeating to yourself the attainment of a positive outcome, is something great athletes and other successful business people have utilised in their focus for attracting success. Dreaming or fantasising with conviction about achieving success in life, will help to successfully 'will' the winner's goals into the realms of reality.
Cosmic Ordering
Using the law of attraction and the power of intention through goal projection, is a combined method for realising one's dreams, desires and aspirations. The methods for attracting the outcomes which the individual wholeheartedly believes in and will manifest, can be easily explained, the process followed and actioned upon, by writing a letter/filling a request form and posting it to the universe through the cosmic ordering system.
For success using the cosmic ordering system, the same laws of attraction apply as they do to 'The Secret', but first one must clear the mind/body of negative energy formations and self-defeating thoughts. Yogic practices such as chakra cleansing, kundalini and Qi gong, can help with this process of clearing energy blockages, as can the use of crystals, essential oils and massage/Reiki – with the help of alternative therapy professionals.
Strong conviction for forming intentions, has also been a practice followed over many generations, through using black-and-white magic. Occult practices of magick for 'willing' intentions into reality, have famously been covered by Aleister Crowley in his Book Of The Law and used by other occultist magicians. Blues, rock and pop stars have also famously been connected to Crowley and magick, which may have contributed to their success. Scientific studies on the topic of magick/attraction have also been positively supporting this phenomenon of will/intention and conviction, manifesting reality.
William Tiller performed a series of experiments where groups were shown to influence changes on physical matter and there have been other successful experiments where data appears to correlate with results which have not occurred randomly. In one experiment for example, a group 'willed' more noughts or ones to be in existence on a random number generator. Bizarrely, probability averages normally appearing around the 50/50 mark, were swayed significantly more in the direction of the intended results, apparently willed into being by the test control groups.
The Global Coherence Project has also made some interesting discoveries where group mindsets have been observed to influence paradigm shifts via positive and negative energy fields emanating around and during major events – such as 9/11, the moon landings and the death of Princess Diana.
Quantum Entanglement
Being part of the one and all – existing at the same instant and in different locations simultaneously is a concept explained by quantum theory. If time is merely a construct of the four-dimensional reality we physically exist in, the quantum theory states that measurable factors outside the four-dimensional paradigm, can exist in different places at the same time – effectively crossing space and time instantaneously. Through advances in quantum physics, it's becoming increasingly more evident where our 'thinking', creativity and consciousness, all function without Newtonian restrictions/rules of our four-dimensional reality.
So our physical bodies may be 'existing' in the Newtonian plane, affected through linear time, but our energetic/spiritual 'bodies' exist in a quantum realm, which are not governed by the same laws. The physical may seem restricted, but if we are all connected to cosmic energy, whereby everything in the universe is entwined, we therefore have an infinite connection to the energy of the universe. Our thoughts, vibrational energy and spirit are intrinsically connected through consciousness. Through regular practice of meditation, we can focus our consciousnesses to connect with this divine one-ness and tap into/harness this abundant cosmic energy.
The RAS Mind Filter
Our brain has a network of nerve cells emanating from an area of the brain, located at the top of the spinal cord, called the Reticular Activating System. Its role in brain function is to increase activation of the entire cerebral area in the brain, by activating neural pathways through directing energy into the brain. The RAS is claimed to be our filter/switch, determining when we are most active and for regulating what kind of information enters the mind.
Training this RAS filter to work for our benefit, will help us achieve life goals and success. In order to 'switch' the filter over from a closed and potentially damaging setting, we must take focus away from the negative thoughts, break harmful habits and indoctrination/attachments to false beliefs, be more open to new ideas and when presented with the new information which can steer us – focus on the things we desire. The filter will turn off what's not required any more to actively seek out our new intentions.
Moon Phase Activation
The different phases of the astral bodies, the sun and moon, all directly affect our energy. Paying attention to the different moon phases in particular, has been a technique for optimising outcomes, used throughout millennia in magic and religious ceremonies for personal gain. Ultimately, understanding that we are made up of energy, we are all part of the universal cosmic energy and can tap into this system for increasing our energy – will award greater chances for attracting success.
The Success Delusion
Remember that success is a guide and not necessarily the goal. The belief that success is a measure of our efforts, is a self-fulfilling trap that we all fall into. In that regard, success is a myth – because success is completely dependent on the observer.
Success can be measured in terms of results, but determining the results as a forethought can ensure we are all successful. For example, I deemed getting up today and writing this blog would be a good use of my time and by reading these words today, I have a confirmation feedback of my success.
But, have I made any great breakthrough statements, and attained wealth and recognition for my words? No. So success on one level has been attained and brings happiness – however, on another level, there has been no increase in my financial wealth or status as a writer/radical thinker or teacher, therefore, in that regard, no real success has been attained. Because I didn't focus on the 'value of the success', the outcome of my day, has been the feedback data I've fed myself, via the RAS filter, back in through my confidence foundations and into confirmation memory banks.
Today, I made the choices about success and confirmed them to memory, for self-confidence. It's irrelevant how important they are to anyone else – it's how you perceive success that matters.
The Observer's Paradox
Everyone needs to remember this fact: Self-observation is affected by the very act of observation, whereby, we as the observer, will influence the outcome of our evaluations. In this paradoxical situation, the observer can either positively or negatively influence the results and because our projections will, like a magnet, attract positive or negative outcomes, it's a useful practice to always self-evaluate from a positive standpoint. Never self-analyse when one is tired, stressed or in a low mood!
Compartmentalisation Of Self
Self-analysis can be carried out in the same way a successful business is run. All aspects considered, the good and the bad findings/results, like a balance sheet, need to be evaluated and stored as separate entries.
We tend to lie to ourselves about almost everything. So writing a daily diary, can be a great way to evaluate oneself. Adding mood information – noting sleep quantity/quality, keeping tabs on meals, types of nutrition, alcohol consumption and exercise, will all help to assess where lifestyle habits are playing a role in mood polarity and affecting energy levels.
Always set measurable timelines around important tasks. Writing goals, resolutions and projections at the beginning of the year, is a good way to kick off a self-evaluation regime. Building on this technique by creating to-do and checklists for daily/weekly and monthly goals, will also help to keep up the self-evaluation. At the end of each day/week/month and year, we can see where performance has been improved and where additional work is needed.
Good Cop Bad Cop
We can either be a supportive or destructive influence in our own lives. There's no point just focussing on just one side of the coin, as we need recognition for the 'good' and awareness of the 'bad' too – but sometimes, the balance will be out of kilter and in the end, we can be left with over-inflated delusions of grandeur or struggle to drag ourselves out of bed to face the world. We can care too much about what everyone else thinks and allow them to elevate or depress us – but the ultimate let-down is when we become over-reliant with ourselves to do that job.
If you take a firm non-biased stand-point that 'good' and 'bad' are merely human constructs and thenceforth, understand the values placed on these badges, everything will depend on what we believe, then we can take a much fairer evaluation of where we feature along this scale. Worrying about what others may think, and hearing the berating voice (of our mother and/or father), are classic precursors for depression and mental illness. Even the most attractive and amazingly intelligent person has bad days. We are all insecure if we allow it – and tend to overly focus on the negatives. That's why constructive self-evaluation needs to be taken from a beneficial and fair starting point.
A good exercise for dishing out a more balanced perspective of our abilities, progress etc., is to list out all the positives and negatives. Do this on separate pages. Now set aside a time/day and allow for a mind-state where you can 'remove yourself from you'. This may involve going somewhere new, wearing different clothes and even creating a different persona!
Evaluations Exercise
Work out a timeframe to make one's evaluations – a week is okay for progressing urgent projects, but a month is much easier to evaluate habit-forming/removal and allows much kinder allowances for any fluctuations with one's progress.
The Points System:
Set your goals and affirmations and keep a daily diary for the entire duration. At the end of the designated period, award yourself ten points for each of the positive aspects investigated, – traits/goals you have focussed on or have gained success in. Make side notes where the successes have been made, as these may need to be carried forward to the next period (useful for measuring progress in an ongoing project or to be monitored on the fly, for sticking with lifestyle changes etc.).
You've marked the positive first, now look at the negative aspects and mark yourself 1 point for each. Make a tally between the positive and the negative aspects – obviously subtracting the negative from the positive. If you have carried this process out correctly, there will be a positive number in the total. Do this same process at the end of each period.
Now the numbers will change, and they may vary significantly from each period, but the key thing to note – they will always be positive. That may be a bit biased, but there's a reason why we stay in the positive.
The focus is not on the actual number – just the act of doing the exercise. Each period starts and ends with a positive because we are making positive assessments. If there was no assessment at all, that would be the negative!
Sure, you'll know there's still plenty of work to be done and the positive numbers will fluctuate at each evaluation, but be sure to reward yourself for every positive outcome – no matter how small the reward is. Applied this way, self-evaluation methods that take the value out of right or wrong, good or bad and focus on the actual 'doing' aspect instead, will always provide those who are willing to make the effort, with greater foundations of success.
Capping off: To focus on success, is to allow failure to take a hold. The only way we can truly further our self-development (taking indicative measures on where 'successes' have been gained), is to keep focussing on effort and consistency. These principle focus points can be practised in our pursuit of goals and when positive projections of our purpose/direction are repeated with daily mantras/affirmations – written and spoken – over time, we can bring forward progression goals and deliver their respective rewards into the realms of reality.
The Balance Illusion
Achieving a middle ground – finding the balance between what we do as a job and how we spend the remainder of our life in pursuit of happiness, is something we continually strive for but realistically, exists fleetingly only.
Balance is a feeling. It's about finding a point where we can optimise our time in a day and over a period of days. Balance in this regard, needs constant re-evaluation and assessment. Out of balance, is again a feeling that we've not got sufficient energy to fulfil our objectives. These objectives are what we focus on to obtain confirmation of success.
Balance and success go hand in hand. If we constantly look for balance and strive for success, we dance between the unattainable and excess, leading to over-exertion/exhaustion – passing balance fleetingly in the moments between. Breaking down our goals into smaller, measurable and easier-to-maintain 'chunks', will help to retain balance and increase the frequency of small feedback confirmations, where success is being achieved.
Affirmations
Affirmations work in the same way as a sorcerer's spell, yogi's mantra or shaman's magick does. Uttered with confidence and belief in their outcomes – this is how we manifest the visualised dreams and desires we wish for ourselves. Repeated affirmations, through outward/inwardly spoken/written words and backed up with positive steps along the way – no matter how small they are. This action alone, will increase confidence in even the most sceptical and negative person to bring about great things for all who believe in it's power.
Choose/create personal affirmations which are short and snappy and have meaning. Using a powerful intentions technique for positive attraction, repeat these affirmations out loud three times in the morning, either facing in the mirror or with your partner, to set magically up your day. :)
